Everytime I try to get free, negativity pulls me back. I've tried clearing my head numerous times today and just can't seem to find the love I need to get thru what it is that I'm going thru.
For those of you that know me, you know that I usually try to look on the bright side, or think positively. Outside looking in, the process always looked easy, but one day you will find that the grass isn't always greener.
Thinking positively for me has always been really hard, because I had always been surrounded by negative forces. I always pull the positivity from within and tried spreading it to others. Whats funny is, when you look to others for positivity, sometimes you get negativity back.
The funniest thing to me is Perception. Perception is one of those things that would be hard to personify, because it's different for everyone, so generalizations could possibly never be made. When I told people that I was having a hard time with what I was doing, it was a form of asking for help. What seemed like a way to reach out for help to me, was perceived as me playing victim by others. I guess what hurts the most is the fact that I keep getting called as the victim player, when I never gave up the whole while asking for help.
So again, I'm stuck. I've just made my creative block worse now with more of these thoughts and now I don't know how to get rid of this label on my chest that says "save me."
As if being dramatic weren't enough....
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